Improper behavior in class has long been a persistent problem for most teachers and one they cannot easily cope with. Nowadays, it has taken on greater dimensions, especially in classrooms, making teaching at times an intolerable experience.
Whether bullying, learning difficulties, or differentiation can be ‘accused’ for this ‘curse’, one thing is for sure: good manners are essential not only in the classroom for creating a respectful and productive learning environment, but also in the world outside—both of which are interconnected and necessary for developing and integrating a person.
This must be taught at a very early age by both parents and educators, who should set the example themselves in order to help children become self-aware, empathetic, compassionate, and well-behaved. It may not be easy, as there are several factors that can lead to misbehavior, but there must be goodwill, communication, cooperation, care, and sincerity among teachers and parents so that these values can be passed on to students as well.
Basic principles and moral values like compassion, empathy, help and support, human values, and rights should be taught both in the family and educational environments to make the world a better place.
In this way, feelings of conscience, self-worth, freedom with respect for others, critical thinking, as well as justice and solidarity will be enhanced, helping children grow into more responsible, mature, and empowered individuals.
A favorite motto that I often remind my students of is “Think and Feel.” Think about how you treat others and how they feel. Only in this way can you acquire understanding and compassion for others. This can be perfectly applied when students become insulting—not only to each other but to their teachers as well! And believe me, I have quite a few examples of that! Setting limits and rules and keeping a healthy balance can certainly help, but what truly makes the difference is the sincere caring and love that comes straight from your heart—that’s what really does the job!
I would like to share with you a personal experience that deeply moved me as both a teacher and a human being. A badly behaved student of mine really made my job extremely difficult, making the lessons nearly impossible and triggering many complaints from both students and parents. I had tried everything, but it seemed like a hopeless case. I became so desperate and saddened that I decided to take him aside and talk to him sincerely, to help him understand how I felt. I touched his hand, looked him straight in the eyes—my own eyes beginning to fill with tears—and said to him with full sincerity, “I need your help. Will you help me, please? Will you?” His face suddenly turned serious; he looked at me sadly and nodded. That was it! It was like a miracle! Something had touched him! From that moment, he became a different person, and a new relationship and line of communication began between us. I felt so excited and fulfilled!
Similar events and experiences with other students followed and helped me grow as a person. Despite the difficulties and annoyances, I may experience during a teaching day, I return home smiling and happy because I feel that I give love and receive love, even though hard teaching days.
Everything starts with us, the teachers. Whatever teaching style or methods we use to help students learn, it is sincere love and care that can truly work miracles. Certainly, we should not overstep and assume the role of parents or become too emotionally entangled with students. We must maintain our boundaries, self-care, and well-being in order to help them adopt these values as well.
Students are like fire: too close, and you get burnt; too far, and it goes out. Balance is the key word. Remind them whenever possible that it’s their manners and character that truly matter—not just acquiring knowledge. Only in this way will they learn to live, work, and communicate as part of a team, not as isolated units, which inevitably leads to loneliness, unhappiness, and social decline.
Setting an example also means observing. Observe your students—their behavior, problems, and learning difficulties—so that you can help them observe themselves too. Act so that they can act. Change yourself so that they change too.
There are key behaviors and manners among students and teachers that truly help foster a positive atmosphere where learning can thrive.
Respectful communication, like speaking politely to each other and using appropriate titles (e.g., Mr., Mrs.), for example.
Active listening by paying attention when others are speaking, avoiding interruptions, working collaboratively in group activities, and sharing materials and ideas generously. Be mindful of others’ feelings and opinions, and avoid negative comments or bullying.
Punctuality is also very important—arriving on time for classes and activities helps students participate effectively in discussions and shows appreciation for others' time and effort. Providing feedback to students—and allowing students to give feedback to teachers—in a respectful manner is crucial. It helps students acknowledge teachers’ hard work, guidance, and support.
Cooperation is a key aspect of learning, as it fosters teamwork and helps students develop essential social skills, preparing them for future collaborative endeavors.
Consideration is equally important, as it creates a supportive atmosphere where everyone can thrive, encouraging kindness and empathy among peers and helping build strong relationships.
Enriching teaching styles, experimenting, and attending psychology seminars to gain insights into how to support student character and personal development are important supplements to our efforts as educators. Furthermore, emphasizing activities like storytelling, drama, games, etc., can motivate learners to enjoy the process of learning while teaching them morals through a “show, don’t tell” approach. This helps prevent boredom, procrastination, and misbehavior while enhancing imagination, creativity, peer interaction, critical thinking, and social skills.
Adhering to classroom rules and guidelines is fundamental to maintaining order and respect and minimizing distractions by following established norms. Through your love and care, you contribute to a more focused and productive classroom atmosphere and help build a supportive educational community.
Manners are not just about etiquette; they are about creating a harmonious environment where everyone feels valued and empowered to learn. Children need love and a good example—you are the example, so set it for them!
